Funny Answers by Brilliants

:~

Q: How can you drop a raw egg onto a concrete floor without cracking it?
A: Concrete floors are very hard to crack!

Q: If it took eight men ten hours to build a wall,how long would it take four men to build it?
A: No time at all it is already built.

Q: If you had three apples and four oranges in one hand and four apples and three oranges in the other hand, what would you have?
A: Very large hands.(Good one)

Q: How can you lift an elephant with one hand?
A: It is not a problem, since you will never find an elephant with one hand.

Q: How can a man go eight days without sleep?
A: No Probs, He sleeps at night.

Q: If you throw a red stone into the blue sea what it will become?
A: It will Wet or Sink as simple as that.

Q: What looks like half apple?
A: The other half.

Q: What can you never eat for breakfast ?
A: Dinner.

Q: What happened when wheel was invented ?
A: It caused a revolution.

Q: Bay of Bengal is in which state?
A: Liquid

Kids Are Quick

:z

TEACHER: Maria, go to the map and find North America.
MARIA: Here it is.
TEACHER: Correct. Now class, who discovered America?
CLASS: Maria.
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TEACHER: John, why are you doing your math multiplication on the floor?
JOHN: You told me to do it without using tables.
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TEACHER: Glenn, how do you spell 'crocodile?'
GLENN: K-R-O-K-O-D-I-A-L'
TEACHER: No, that's wrong.
GLENN: Maybe it is wrong, but you asked me how I spell it.

(I Love this kid)
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TEACHER: Donald, what is the chemical formula for water?
DONALD: H I J K L M N O.
TEACHER: What are you talking about?
DONALD: Yesterday you said it's H to O.
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TEACHER: Winnie, name one important thing we have today that we didn't have ten years ago.
WINNIE: Me!
__________________________________________

TEACHER: Glen, why do you always get so dirty?
GLEN: Well, I'm a lot closer to the ground than you are.
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TEACHER: Millie, give me a sentence starting with 'I.'
MILLIE: I is..
TEACHER: No, Millie..... Always say, 'I am.'
MILLIE: All right... 'I am the ninth letter of the alphabet.'
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TEACHER: George Washington not only chopped down his father's cherry tree, but also admitted it. Now, Louie, do you know why his father didn't punish him?
LOUIS: Because George still had the axe in his hand.
______________________________________

TEACHER: Now, Simon, tell me frankly, do you say prayers before eating?
SIMON: No sir, I don't have to, my Mom is a good cook.
______________________________

TEACHER: Clyde, your composition on 'My Dog' is exactly the same as your brother's. Did you copy his?
CLYDE: No, sir. It's the same dog.
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TEACHER: Harold, what do you call a person who keeps on talking when people are no longer interested?
HAROLD: A teacher

Mga Pamatay na Hirit

:r

(Karugtong ng Corny Pick-up Lines)

"Kumain ka ba ng asukal? Ang tamis kasi ng ngiti mo!"

"May lahi ka bang keyboard? Type kasi kita!"

"Ipapupulis kita! Ninakaw mo kasi ang puso ko!"

"Are you a dictionary? Kasi, you add meaning to my life."

"Meron ka bang lisensya? Kasi, you drive me crazy."

"I lost my number. Can I have yours?"

"Angel ba ang name mo? Kasi, you look like one."

"I forgot your name. Can I call you mine?"


PAMATAY NA REPLY

"Excuse me, kumain ka ba ng mais? Ang corny mo kasi!"

Bill Gates Recruits New Chairman

:D

Bill Gates organized an enormous session to recruit a new
Chairman for Microsoft Europe.

Exactly 5,000 candidates assembled in a large room. One candidate is
MARIO DIMACULANGAN.

Bill Gates: Thank you for coming. Those who do not know JAVA may leave.
2,000 people leave the room.

MARIO says to himself, 'I do not know JAVA but I have nothing to loseif I stay. I'll give it a try.

Bill Gates: Candidates who never had experience in managing more than100 people may leave.
2,000 people leave the room.

Mario says to himself ' I never managed anybody but myself, but I have nothing to lose if I stay.
What can happen to me?' So he stays.

Bill Gates: Candidates who do not have management diplomas may leave.
500 people leave the room.

Mario says to himself, 'I left high school at 15 but what have I got to lose? So he stays in the room.

Lastly, Bill Gates asked the candidates who do not speak Serbo - Croat to leave.
498 people leave the room.

Mario says to himself, ' I do not speak one word of Serbo - Croat but
what do I have to lose?' So he stays and finds himself with one other candidate. Everyone else has gone.

Bill Gates joined them and said 'Apparently you are the only
two candidates who speak Serbo - Croat, so I'd now like to hear you have a conversation together in that language.'

Calmly, Mario turns to the other candidate and says, `Unsa mana, Dong?'
The other candidate answers 'Ewan ko, Pre.'