Matuwa Ka

:~ 1. Yaya buys food at McDo. Crew: “Dito niyo na po ba kakainin?” Yaya: “Puwede sa table?” --- --- --------- --------- 2. Kid: “Yaya look, boats!” Yaya: “Dows are not boats, dey’re yachts.” Kid: “Yaya, spell yachts?” Yaya: “Yor rayt, dey are boats.” --- --- --------- --------- 3. Woman carrying sick baby enters doctor’s office. Doc: “Bottlefed?” Woman: “Breastfed po.” (Doctors squeezes woman’s breasts repeatedly) Doc: “Ayan ang problema, wala kang gatas, eh.” Woman: “Yaya lang po ako doc! Yaya!” --- --- --------- --------- 4. The eggs that yaya bought turned out to be rotten. She stormed back to the grocery and told the vendor: “Manong, ang baho ng itlog niyo!” --- --- --------- --------- 5. My mom asked our yaya to buy Inquirer and Star. Our yaya came back and said: “Ma’am, wala pong Inquirer kaya bumili nalang po ako ng dalawang Star!” --- --- --------- --------- 6. Yaya: “Huhuhu…” Ate: “O, bakit ka umiiyak?” Yaya: “Kasi ate ang dami kong pimples!” ...

:p AMO: Inday, ano ginawa mo sa microwave natin at sumabog? INDAY: Success is often the result of taking misstep in the right direction. Show me a person who has never made a mistake and I'll show you somebody who has never achieved much. AMO: Impostora! Lumayas ka dito! ****** AMO: Inday, bakit mo binenta yung sira na silya? INDAY: I have computed the chair's value less cost to sell, and the value in use using projections for 5 years and a pretax discount rate. Accordingly, the value in use is lower, so I decided to sell the chair. This is an accordance with PAS18 on revenue, PAS16 on PPE, and PAS36 on Impairment of Assets. AMO: *fainted* Si Inday talaga, accountant din pala! ****** Nagpunta sa probinsya ang pamilya Montemayor para sa dalawang araw na bakasyon. Kasama nila si Inday at inutusan siyang kumuha ng papaya mula sa puno para ihalo sa tinolang iluluto ni Mrs. Montemayor. Mrs. Montemayor : Inday, ipitas mo nga ako ng papaya para matapos na itong tinola ko. Inday: Su...